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Blogs and Articles

Seeing the World Differently: Colour Perception and Dementia

20/7/2025

 
Dementia affects more than memory - it can also change the way a person sees and experiences the world around them. One area that’s often overlooked is colour perception. For someone living with dementia, colours can appear duller, blend together, or even take on different meanings. Understanding this can make a big difference in how safe, comfortable, and independent a person feels in their home or care setting.

Why Does Colour Perception Change?
The brain plays a key role in how we process visual information and damage to the brain can affect depth perception, contrast sensitivity, and colour differentiation. People may begin to struggle with seeing objects clearly, especially if they’re similar in tone or blend into their surroundings.

Dark colours can be seen as holes or obstacles. Shiny surfaces may appear wet or unsafe. Patterns can be confusing or overwhelming. Even something as simple as a white toilet in a white bathroom can become difficult to identify.

Practical Tips to Support Colour Perception. 
Here are some simple, effective ways to use colour and contrast to support someone living with a dementia:

1. Use Strong Contrasts
Choose items that clearly contrast with their surroundings. A red plate on a white tablecloth is easier to see than a white plate on a white surface. This can help improve appetite and confidence at mealtimes.

2. Make Important Objects Stand Out
Use bold colours for things that need to be easily seen like toilet seats, grab rails, light switches, or door frames. 

3. Avoid Confusing Patterns
Busy patterns on carpets, furniture or walls can be disorienting. Stick to plain, contrasting colours where possible, especially on floors and stairs.

4. Beware of Dark or Shiny Surfaces
Dark rugs or mats may be perceived as holes or something to be avoided, causing hesitation or fear. Likewise, shiny floors might look slippery. Use matt finishes and lighter, neutral tones where safe and appropriate.

5. Use Colour to Support Independence
Colour-coding areas can help people navigate their home or care setting more confidently. For example, a red door could signal the bathroom, while a green one leads to the kitchen. This gentle guidance can reduce anxiety and support independence.

Why It Matters
When someone with dementia can’t make sense of their environment, they may become confused, anxious, or distressed. Small changes in colour and contrast can make everyday tasks feel easier, safer, and more familiar.

These are simple but powerful tools!​
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Does Your Parent Have a Dementia?

4/7/2025

 
Finding clarity, comfort and community on the Isle of Wight

“Mum keeps losing things and seems a bit muddled.”
“Dad keeps telling me the same stories - sometimes three times in an hour.”

If these moments feel familiar, you’re not alone. When you notice memory changes in your parents it can feel frightening and you might not know where to turn, but help is closer than you think.
Whether you live in Ryde or Reading, Cowes or Cardiff, this guide will walk you through the first steps to take when you think a parent living on the Isle of Wight might have a dementia.

1. Noticing the Early Signs
Dementia isn’t one condition; it’s an umbrella term for a collection of symptoms that affect memory, attention, and logical thinking. These symptoms might include:
  • Short‑term memory lapses (losing things, missing appointments, forgetting conversations)
  • Difficulties doing things they have always done such as following familiar recipes or playing card games
  • Confusion over money, dates or ferry times
  • Withdrawal from hobbies or social invites
  • Mood changes - unexpected irritability, anxiety or apathy
Tip: Keep a dated notebook of the changes you observe. This can be helpful at GP appointments.

2. Book a GP Appointment
The NHS recommends visiting the person’s own GP as the first step if there are memory concerns. If you live on the mainland and your parents are on the Island, you could phone the surgery together on loud‑speaker or write an email listing your observations.

3. Practical Ways to Help (even from a distance)
If you live on the mainland and your parents live on the Island
  • Set up video calling devices (Portal, Echo Show) with large icons
  • Arrange automatic bill payments to reduce admin stress
  • Schedule food or pharmacy deliveries
  • Use a shared digital calendar for appointments as well as encouraging your parents to have a large and easy to read calendar up on the wall
  • Talk to your other parent about labelling draws and cupboards and putting reminders on the fridge

If you live on the Island
  • If possible, offer to do a joint visit to the GP or Memory Clinic
  • Label drawers and cupboards in your parent’s home; pop reminders on the fridge. Make things visible!
  • Drop in regularly for a cup of tea and gentle “how are things?” chat
  • Attend local groups and share hand outs and information with family. You don’t need a diagnosis of dementia to attend Alzheimer Cafés or Parklands Dementia Resource Centre.  

4. How Alzheimer Café Isle of Wight Can Help
Alzheimer Café Isle of Wight is not a clinic - it’s a community. Guests enjoy tea, cake and informal talks around dementia related topics. It’s a chance to be part of an Island-wide support network where you can seek support and information.
  • No diagnosis required. If you’re still at the “could it be…?” stage, come along.
  • Free of charge. We are a non-profit organisation and don’t charge for any of our Alzheimer Cafés.
  • Practical take‑aways. Informative presentations as well as signposting to other useful resources and services on the Island.
  • Emotional support. Meet other sons, daughters, partners and friends who are in the same boat as you.

5. Key Isle of Wight Resources at a Glance
Alzheimer Café Isle of Wight
www.alzheimercafeiow.org.uk
01983 220200
[email protected]

Parklands Dementia Resource Centre
Park Road, Cowes, PO31 7LZ
www.alzheimercafeiow.org.uk
01983 220200
[email protected]

Carers IW
www.carersiw.org.uk
01983 533173
[email protected]

Memory Service, DOT & Admiral Nurse Service
South Block
St Mary’s Hospital
Newport
Isle of Wight
PO30 5TG
01983 822099

Isle of Wight Age UK
www.ageuk.org.uk/isleofwight
01983 525282
[email protected]

A Final Word of Encouragement
Dementia can feel like uncharted water, especially when a Solent crossing might separate you from your parents. Yet hundreds of Island families navigate this journey every year—and they do it best when they have a good support network in place.

So, ask the question: “Does my parent have a dementia?”
Then take the next steps: book that GP chat, jot your observations down, and drop into an Alzheimer Café or to Parklands Dementia Resource Centre. You’ll leave with practical information, and the comforting knowledge that you, and your parents, are part of a caring and supportive Island community.

For more information about Parklands Dementia Resource Centre, call 01983 220200.
For information about our Alzheimer Cafés around the Island, email [email protected]. 

Stress - Why Does it Sneak up on You?

3/7/2025

 
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When you're caring for someone with a dementia, stress can feel like a constant companion, yet it often creeps up on us slowly, almost silently. One day you might feel like you're managing, and the next you're overwhelmed, exhausted, and wondering how you got there.

So why does stress sneak up on us? And more importantly, what can we do about it?

Firstly, What is Stress?
Stress isn’t just about feeling tense — though that’s part of it. We can describe it as the gap between the life we imagine and the one we’re living. It’s when we’re stuck in the “I don’t know what to do” zone, caught between fight and flight, and unable to move in either direction.

For carers, that gap can feel enormous. You might long for your old routine, the chance to be spontaneous, or even just to get a full night’s sleep, but your reality looks very different a lot of the time.

Where Does Stress Come From?
Stress can arise from:

The world around us:

  • Noise, clutter, time pressures
  • Constant vigilance and concern for safety
  • Feeling watched, judged, or isolated

Within our bodies:
  • Fatigue, poor sleep, aches and pains
  • Lack of exercise or nourishing food
  • Carrying invisible emotional weight

Sometimes, stress is sparked by very real, immediate demands but often it's ‘imaginary’ fear that holds us in a constant state of alert. We might begin to worry, asking ourselves “What if I’m not doing enough?” “What if I can’t cope?” “What if my husband/wife/mother/father wakes up and goes for a walk at night and gets lost?”

Unlike real danger, imaginary fear doesn't end. We carry it with us, and it becomes the stress we live and breathe. It can be totally unfounded, can make us want to run and hide, isolate ourselves, it can make us defensive, and unless we address it and talk about it, it will likely continue to grow within us and can spread to others.

How Stress Affects You
You might think stress just makes you feel tired or irritable — but it runs much deeper. Some symptoms can include:


  • Ongoing fatigue or low energy
  • Body aches, headaches, or illnesses that don’t shift
  • Changes in sleep, appetite, mood, or skin
  • Feeling guilty, indecisive, or detached
  • Withdrawing from people you love
  • High blood pressure
  • Rapid heartbeat or chest pain
  • Nausea and digestive issues

These are not signs of weakness — they’re signals from your body and mind asking for help.

So, What Can You Do?
Dr.Gemma Jones says, “To master stress, you must change your thoughts, behaviour and lifestyle choices.” That doesn’t mean overhauling your life overnight, but it does mean trying to tune into what helps and what doesn’t.

Unhealthy ‘coping’ might look like:

  • Bottling everything up
  • Overworking, over-giving, or ignoring your own needs
  • Isolating yourself

Healthier strategies could include:
  • Taking 10 minutes just for you (yes, you’re allowed!)
  • Reaching out to someone in the same boat - talking about your stress can help more than you might realise
  • Moving your body, even just a short walk
  • Eating and sleeping as well as you can
  • Being kind to yourself — you are doing your best!

You’re Not Alone
Stress thrives in silence and isolation. It loses power when we talk about it, share it, and take small steps to reclaim space for ourselves. If you’re caring for someone with a dementia, you are carrying so much around with you. Let this be your reminder: your wellbeing counts too. After all, you can’t pour from an empty cup.


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​Understanding Grieving and Guilt

2/7/2025

 
When we hear the word ‘grief’ we often think of death, but did you know we can also grieve for change?
If you're caring for someone with a dementia, you've likely experienced grief not just once, but many times over — in waves, in quiet moments, and in the unexpected.

Dementia can bring with it lots of changes; changes to the person you’re caring for, changes to your daily routine and lifestyle, changes in your relationship, and you may feel grief for these changes even though the person you are caring for might be sitting right next to you.

Alongside grief, many carers carry another heavy emotion: guilt. Understanding these complex feelings can help ease the emotional load and remind you that you're not alone, and that everything you’re feeling is very common.
 
What is Grief?
The word “grief” comes from the French verb grever — meaning to burden or weigh down and that’s exactly what grief can feel like: a weight on your chest, in your body, or in your thoughts. It’s messy. It doesn’t follow a straight path. It isn’t linear. It often comes in waves, triggered by small or big changes. It is unique to everyone, and at one time or another, we will all grieve for loss or change.

For carers, grief often starts long before a loved one passes. You may grieve for:


  • The loss of shared memories
  • Changing roles and relationships
  • Watching the person you’re caring for change
  • Seeing your role change from partner to carer
  • The life you imagined for them, and for you

This kind of grief is called anticipatory grief. It’s valid, it’s normal, and it deserves and needs space to be felt.

The Grief Journey: It’s Not a Straight Line
You might be familiar with one of the most famous grief models developed by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. In this model there are five stages of grief — denial, anger, bargaining, despair, and acceptance. Kubler-Ross suggests that each stage needs ‘completion’ before someone can move to the next stage, but that’s it’s possible and, in fact, likely to move back and forth between them.

For carers, there’s often an added stage: resignation. This can happen when the ongoing changes feel relentless, or when it becomes hard to keep facing the same challenges every day.

Remember - these stages aren’t linear. You can move back and forth between them. Some days might feel peaceful; others might bring frustration or sorrow — sometimes all at once. Grief takes a unique path for everyone, and it’s important to understand that you can’t go around grief. You can’t avoid it. You must go through it.

Grief can affect both the person living with a dementia and those who care for them. The person with a dementia may lose the ability to understand losses and grief but may still have a generalised feeling that something is wrong.

Denial
For carers, denial can be a protective shield — a way to avoid pain or postpone difficult decisions. But over time, denial can isolate you from support and leave you feeling stuck or overwhelmed.

Guilt: The Secret Grief
Guilt often hides in the background. It whispers:

  • “I should be doing more.”
  • “Why do I feel angry or resentful?”
  • “Did I say the right thing?”
  • “I shouldn't feel like this.”

Guilt and grief are closely linked — but they serve different emotional purposes. Grief is a process that, in time, can lead to acceptance. Guilt, especially unhealthy guilt, can keep you stuck.

Healthy guilt helps us reflect and make amends when needed.
Unhealthy guilt stems from unrealistic expectations — like thinking you should be superhuman.

You are not superhuman. You are a human doing your best in very difficult circumstances.

Moving Toward Acceptance
Acceptance doesn’t mean you’re “okay” with everything. It means:


  • You’ve stopped fighting what you can’t change.
  • You’re making space to live in the present moment with your new reality
  • You’re ready to seek support — and allow joy and laughter back in

As Maslow said:
“I can feel guilt about the past, apprehension about the future, but only in the present can I act.” Acceptance opens the door to better support for both you and the person you care for.

How to Cope and Heal
It’s important to acknowledge that your grief will always be a part of your life and you can honour the grief by finding the right space for it. It might look different over time, and your life around the grief will inevitably look different. Whatever path your grief takes and however it looks for you, remember that everything you’re feeling is a completely normal and healthy reaction to change or loss. We must go through grief. We cannot run or hide from it. Going through it is the only way to make it out the other side of the forest.


  • Talk it out – Join groups, create a network, or speak consider speaking to a counsellor.
  • Name your guilt – Recognise when it’s helpful and when it’s just a weight.
  • Get informed – Understanding dementia helps reduce fear and confusion.
  • Ask for help – You don’t have to do this alone.

At places like Parklands Dementia Resource Centre and Alzheimer Café Isle of Wight, carers and families find connection, information, and support. Whether it’s a quiet cup of tea, a shared story, or just a place to be heard — you are welcome.

Remember - you are not failing. You’re feeling. And you’re not alone.


Find us: Parklands Dementia Resource Centre, Park Road, Cowes, PO31 7LZ
Call us: 01983 220200 
Email us: [email protected] 
For information about our cafés across the Island email: [email protected] 
​

Communication and Dementia: Tips for Meaningful and Positive Dialogue

1/7/2025

 
Communicating with someone with a dementia can be challenging and we might find ourselves unsure of how to respond in certain situations, or if we’re saying and doing the ‘right’ things.
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Answering questions time and time again can feel frustrating, and feeling like we need to correct things that we know aren’t ‘true’ or ‘accurate’ can lead to anger and upset. We’ve been there, we understand, and we are here to offer a few hints and tips that might help.

Connection rather than correction
Its said that ‘all human behaviour is a form of communication’. When attempting to communicate with someone with a dementia, take time to listen and observe how they are feeling. A good example of this is a person talking about their mother and father as if they are still alive even though they may have passed away a long time ago.
Any one of us may have lovely memories of parents who are dear to us and who have supported us when times have been tough or demanding so it makes sense that as dementia progresses and we are feeling ‘lost’ in time and place, that we may get a little muddled in knowing the ‘facts of the matter’. The person with a dementia may be asking about a parent because they feel unsafe and are looking for someone to reassure or help them. Letting the person know that they are safe, and that everything is ok can help reduce anxiety and agitation.

To tell the person that their mother died many years ago may have a huge emotional impact – it may be like hearing that news for the very first time. So instead of correcting them, try redirecting the conversation. After acknowledging that they may be feeling sad or upset, ask if they have been thinking about their mother, then talk a little about the things they liked to do together, holidays they went on in the past, and enjoy reminiscing about the happy memories they have. As people with a dementia move on in their journey they may be unable to retain new information but their oldest memories are usually fairly secure, so reminiscing and asking about their past is a really good way to create a positive and meaningful dialogue.

Instead of correcting someone with a dementia when they are mistaken, try to acknowledge their feelings and reassure them. Another tell-tale sign that people are not feeling safe in their environment may be them saying, “I need to go home now”. Rather than explaining that they already are home, acknowledge that you understand they are feeling sad/unhappy/upset then you might respond by saying, “where’s home? What do you like about it?” Who did you live there with?" You can then go on to continue to reassure and talk about people and places that the person remembers. This approach acknowledges their emotions and might help to redirect the conversation in a comforting way

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Avoid arguing
If the person with a dementia insists on something that isn’t accurate, try not to argue. Instead, gently redirect or go along with their reality if it brings them comfort. Avoid telling untruths if possible, as it could result in losing the trust of the person. 

Here's an example - if the person believes they have an appointment that doesn’t exist, rather than saying, “no, you don’t have an appointment,” you might say, “let’s check your diary/calendar. In the meantime, would you like a cup of tea?” You can move the conversation along without anger or frustration from either person involved.

If they are anxious about a situation that isn't accurate, try reassuring them by saying you’ll make some calls and ask if they’d like to listen so some music or do something they like while you get to the bottom of things. You will likely find that the new activity breaks the cycle of worry and anxiety, even if it’s just for a short while.

Reminisce
Looking at old photographs, listening to familiar music, or talking about past experiences can spark joy and encourage conversation. For instance, saying, “I found this picture of you at the beach! Did you like going to the beach?” may bring back fond memories and ease communication.
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Remember – those older, earlier memories are still there and by using photographs and music as prompts and triggers, you may find you both take a lovely trip down memory lane together.

Ask questions in a clear and concise way
Complex questions can be overwhelming for someone with a dementia. Instead of asking, “What would you like for breakfast?” try, “Would you like cereal or toast for breakfast today?” This provides a clear choice which can make it easier for the person to respond to and also includes them in decisions about their day.


Allow plenty of time to respond
​Someone with a dementia may need extra time to process information and respond. Try to avoid interrupting or finishing their sentences, even if they struggle to find the right words. Instead, wait patiently and offer gentle prompts if needed. For example, if they forget a word, you could ask, “are you thinking of your favourite blue shoes?” rather than, “You mean your blue shoes.”
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Try to stay positive and reassuring
As with any interactions we have in life, our attitude and tone can greatly impact the mood and the communication with someone with a dementia. If that person is struggling to communicate, try to remain patient and reassuring. If appropriate, touch their hand to let them know you’re there and that they are safe. Smile at them, let them know there’s nothing to worry about and that everything is ok. Sometimes we don’t need to say anything at all to let someone know we’re there for them.
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Take care of yourself
Caring for someone with a dementia is emotionally and physically demanding. Make sure to take breaks and seek support from places such as Alzheimer Café Isle of Wight, Parklands Dementia Resource Centre, or Carers IW. There are lots of people in the same boat as you, and by talking to others, sharing stories, learning, and creating a support network which includes others who understand, everything can begin to feel that bit easier.
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We’re here to help
If you have any questions about our blog or would like any advice or support, please get in touch. You can email us at [email protected], call us on 01983 220200, or visit us at Parklands Dementia Resource Centre, Park Road, Cowes, PO31 7LZ.​

What is 'Blue Space' and how can it contribute to good mental health?

1/5/2025

 
​You may have heard of a ‘green space’ i.e a garden, a meadow, or a forest, but recently the term "blue space" has gained traction, and for good reason. So, what exactly is a blue space, and how does it benefit our mental well-being? We’ve taken a closer look at the remarkable ways in which blue spaces can positively impact our mental health.

Defining Blue Space
A blue space refers to any natural water body, such as oceans, lakes, rivers, and even smaller bodies of water like ponds or fountains. It's ​the counterpart of the more commonly known term "green space," which signifies natural environments like parks, forests, and gardens. Blue spaces, however, focus on the presence of water and the serene feelings associated with aquatic settings.

The Power of Water
Numerous scientific studies have highlighted the therapeutic effects of blue spaces on mental well-being. The sight and sound of water can induce a sense of calm and relaxation, triggering what's often referred to as the "blue mind" state. The gentle lapping of waves, the rhythmic flow of a river, or the expansive view of an ocean horizon can all contribute to reducing stress and anxiety levels.
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Mental health benefits of blue space can include:
 
Stress Reduction
Blue spaces can reduce stress and promote a state of rest and relaxation. The sound of water, whether it's the gentle trickle of a stream or the crashing of waves, can lower cortisol levels and alleviate tension.
 
Improved Mood
Being near water triggers the release of endorphins, the body's natural mood enhancers. The soothing nature of blue spaces can uplift mood and provide respite from the demands of daily life.
 
Connection with Nature
The sight of water can give us a sense of connection with the natural world. This connection has been shown to foster feelings of gratitude and well-being.
 
Physical Activity
Many blue spaces offer opportunities for a little bit of physical activity like walking along the shore which not only benefits physical health but also promotes mental wellness.
 
How can we Incorporating Blue Spaces into Daily Life?
Living on an island, we are extremely lucky to be surrounded by beautiful beaches offering up plenty of blue space but not everyone has access to vast oceans or serene lakes. If you aren’t lucky enough to have the beach on your doorstep, there are other ways to incorporate blue spaces into daily life for mental health benefits.
 
Visit other local water bodies
Seek out nearby lakes, rivers, or even urban water features like fountains to enjoy moments of tranquillity.
 
Nature Sounds
Listening to recordings of water sounds or using apps that simulate the sounds of oceans or rivers can help create a calming atmosphere.
 
Indoor Water Features:
Adding indoor water features like tabletop fountains or aquariums can provide a touch of blue space within the living environment.
 
Virtual Escapes:
When physical access is limited, virtual reality experiences or nature documentaries centered around water can provide a similar sense of relaxation.
 
Embracing the concept of blue spaces can offer a refreshing and invigorating way to support our mental health. Whether it's the vastness of the ocean or the serenity of a quiet pond, these natural water environments have a remarkable ability to restore our well-being and remind us of the beauty and tranquillity that exists in the world around us.
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